I really don’t like gross yucky stuff. I also don’t like the corner of my yard that is overgrown. That’s the same corner that backs up to the corner of my neighbor’s yard and his junk pile.  We all sort of pretend that area isn’t there.  I hate when the dogs go in there (because that is where snakes are more likely to be) but they only dash through occasionally when they feel the need to chase the cats. (The same cats they never chase in the house. Go figure.)

There aren’t many things I don’t like about dogs but the ones there are have to do with my aversion to yuckyness. Dogs will touch anything and anything they will touch they will lick and if it is really nasty (read: dead) they will roll around in it.

My dogs will play in the yard like the wolf decedents they are but they don’t stay out very long and almost never in the dark.  When they do play I don’t leave them long by themselves or they dig and digging gets them dirty. Yuck.

Last night I let the poodles out to pee before bed. They were out for a few minutes and I went to call them in. No one listened to me. It’s not unusual for someone to lag or maybe even ignore my first call but they never all ignore me. Panama and Brighid are usually in so fast I am hoping they really went pee. But last night, nothing.  I called again. Still nothing. I grabbed my whistle. This is for serious recall. They always come, every dog 100% of the time when I use the whistle. I blow a short blast on the whistle. Panama comes running followed by Brighid but no one else.Well, this is annoying. I’m in my slippers and it’s chilly and three poodles are paying no attention to me.

When a dog ignores you or reacts in a way completely different from what you expect it’s always a good time for a training session. Well it was 11:30 pm and I was in no mood for a training session. I was in the mood for quiet dogs INSIDE the house and in the mood for bed.  I put my boots on and walked down to the end of the yard they were in, that area they almost never go in, and coaxed them into the house.

It was very apparent that they’d been into something but I couldn’t figure out what it could be. There was a greasy smell, like the shirt of someone who has worked at McDonalds all day.  The dogs looked greasy. Their ear feathering was dirty and greasy and their paws were filthy. I thought chicken but it really didn’t smell like chicken.  I was baffled. And very annoyed.  If there was something like that in my yard, someone put it in my yard.  I got concerned about the possibility of someone putting something poisoned in my yard but that fear faded as they remained perky and no one developed a stomach problem. I was baffled and I had a houseful of dirty dogs.

For the first time in ages everyone slept in crates. This morning before I let them out I got dressed and put on boots and braced myself for whatever I would find out there. Then I let them lead me to it.  I’m still baffled about what I found but my only guess is that my neighbor (or his kid) dumped the grease from a fryer either at the fence line or over the fence.  There was an area that was just greasy. The grass and leaves were clearly covered with grease. The dogs were licking it, digging in the greasy dirt and loving it.

How do you clean this kind of mess up? It took me a while to think of anything and I’m not sure that my solution was a good one. I went inside and got the bucket of kitty litter and dumped a layer of kitty litter all over the greasy area. Either that will absorb it and we’ll worry about cleaning up the kitty litter later or the dogs will still be attracted to it and they’ll be covered in greasy kitty litter. I’m not sure which will happen but I’m sure hoping for the first option. In the meantime I had to bathe all 5 poodles (and wash the couches. Thank God for leather furniture.)